Catch up

Wow...it's been quite a while since I wrote....
So...if anyone IS actually reading this, I wonder if you have thoughts of what it has been like to be me in the midst of the most consumeristic season of the American year. Here is what it has been like (I should have written as each moment came...but...it was also a season of getting grades in...)
In an effort to not spend too much, we opened a separate checking account (which gifted us with $150 dollars just for joining!! extra Christmas money!) with money that was gifted to us through doing some pre-martial counseling. With that money, Ryan and I sat down one night and decided what we would spend on each member of our family that we were to exchange gifts with and those who also needed gifts due to work exchanges. With some sewing that I did (aLOT of sewing...), blowing up photos and making $10 calendars (thankYOU costco!) and re-purposing frames for gifts...etc...etc...we were able to give each person (20 folks total, including Ryan and I) a gift. It was a blessing. We also were able to give 10% of that money towards two chickens and two soccer balls via worldvision.com as a gift to Jesus. We wanted to do something with the kids in order to help them to better understand this season...i hope to make this a tradition...
how do you talk to your kids about the gifts they didn't get?
all day on christmas day our son was moping all about. he is a stubborn little man and i figured it was because he wanted to go home and play on his new drum set/kit (someone GAVE us an AWESOME drum kit because they knew he loved rock and roll music!!!). no. that wasn't it. he was upset that he didn't get a star wars laptop. this laptop that was at costco that he held in his hand for like 30 seconds...that gift is the gift that was stuck in his mind that he didn't receive....that was the cause of his moping about. once i stepped out a bit from my frustration with his attitude, i couldn't help but relate to the little guy. no matter how much i have received, or wanted...there was still a ting of wanting more...all the things that i got that didn't fill me whole. i sat in the car and talked to him a little bit about how the gifts he had received were from the heart and not to make him mad...asking him how he'd feel if we didn't like the gifts we received from him and actually told him so...and just talking and listening to him a bit more about how he liked the laptop and that indeed there are times in life we don't always get what we want...but how can we let those who love us and who thought a lot about what they purchased for you, how we can with a thankful heart give them a gift by saying thank you. man...how would you have handled that?
again, i do go back to how i relate to him. that day, i got an amazing gift. a nikon 3000 dslr. the only thing i kept thinking was, "does it do hd video?" it doesn't. i was discontent. could i be more selfish? i talked to the Lord about it. why was it that i got this amazing gift that i had wanted for soooo long...and still wished for more? can i be content? i was fine the day before when i didn't have a dslr. it is a pretty amazing camera. i was thinking out of convenience sake that having everything in one camera versus having a dslr, a video camera and a point and shoot...what if they were just all in one...my rationale was rather rational. however, still...this train of thinking still left me wanting more...
how can be content in this world when everything changes and the next and best thing will always be out there...
lord, i need you.